The wedding party - choosing your best man and maid of honour

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The wedding party refers to the attendants at your wedding. These are the special people who are involved either by virtue of their relationships to the couple, or by close ties of friendship.

The Father of the bride is, in more traditional weddings, the one who funds the event. It is likely he has been saving for this big day since his little girl was born! He also has the wonderful task of walking the bride down the aisle, and giving a welcome speech at the opening of the wedding reception. The Mother of the bride does not have official duties, but her role is likely to include helping with the wedding plans and as moral support. The parents of the groom are often included, by helping with the wedding planning and sometimes by contributing financially, too. It is up to the couple how to share out responsibilities between their parents to avoid conflict.

For the groom, the Best Man acts like his right hand man — ensuring he arrives at the ceremony on time, and most importantly calming his nerves! The Best Man is usually the groom’s brother or best friend, and leads the Stag Night or Bachelor Party fun and frivolities. He is also tasked with giving a humorous speech at the reception. The groomsmen, or ushers, are the other male friends and family who help in any number of ways, such as ushering at the ceremony.

The bride has her posse of aides too. The Maid or Matron of Honour is the closest person to the bride, and helps her make important decisions about planning, such as her choice of wedding dress. She is given the honour of being the last person to walk down the aisle before the bride. There may also be bridesmaids who are close female friends or relatives, and can be any age. Finally, there can also be a Flower Girl (or sometimes Boy!), who is the first to walk down the aisle, scattering petals as they go.

Although these are the basic members of the wedding party, there are some optional extras. The Ringbarer is a young boy who walks alongside the Flower Girl, his ringbaring pillow held high. You may also choose to have other VIPs who may give readings, sing songs or play instruments.

Some cultures have additional roles. For example, Jewish weddings will often have Chuppah carriers who hold the canopy aloft during the ceremony, and Greek Orthodox weddings include a koumbaro — a male friend or relative who places the crowns on the newlyweds’ heads. Don’t forget some basic people employed by the chapel who are also considered as part of the wedding party, most importantly the officiant, but also candle lighters and choir members.

© The Pink Fridge Online Magazine 2008 - The Wedding Party